Dear Rosey: I hate going to my job
First, I LOVE that Desert Rose is doing Dear Rosey posts, btw. I am a web content manager for a local agency, and I loved my job when I first started it. Now, I hate having to wake up in the morning to come to work. They literally expect me to work for almost free sometimes, like when they kept calling me on my day off, asking questions about the website. Or when they asked me to go to an event on the weekend, and submit content to completely redo a project I had already spent several hours on. It’s like they are always changing their mind about what they want from me. Then my boyfriend tells me to just quit, but I don’t really know what I would do if I didn’t work there. I’m really starting 0to get pissed off, by him making this seem like an easy fix, when it’s not really. It sucks, I’m not motivated to go out and look for a new job, so I’m just getting more and more angry with life in general, but especially at work. One of my coworkers made a comment to me the other day, and I lost it. My supervisor pulled me aside, and asked if I am okay. I was actually afraid she was going to fire me, so I just said “Yeah” but truth is, I am not. I’m worried about how angry I am getting, but I also don’t know what to do about changing my situation. Am I the only one experiencing this?
Dear Angry Birdie,
Thank you, we at Desert Rose are excited to do Dear Rosey posts! It is our experience that people are not always able to come into counseling and this enables are readers to be able to interact with our therapists when they are experiencing problems.
In regard to your dissatisfaction with your job, absolutely no, you are not the only one who experiences this! Many people go through times when they start to loose motivation about going to work. At first your job was new and exciting and it sounds like you really enjoyed it. As time has progressed your employer has expected more from you because they feel you are capable of doing the work. As a manager there also comes responsibilities and with the type of work you are doing it sounds like some of those responsibilities get in the way of your personal life. It is okay to set boundaries and if you have too much on your plate explain to your boss the importance of your projects and tasks and work on a plan to push these into priority or set time frames. It is very important to remember work-life balance and when it feels that the balance is not working take time to focus on it. Do something you enjoy or just take a few minutes out of your day to help relieve the stress you are feeling. Keep a gratitude journal that is work related and at the end of your day, write one thing down which could be big or small that you are grateful for at your work. If could be something small like a coworker smiled or something big like your boss really liked an idea of yours. Challenge yourself to come up with new thoughts for your journal and then once a week reflect back on it. The more you remain grateful the less you will let things affect you like your coworker who had made the comment. As for your boyfriend saying just quit, that is not always so easy, as you stated “I don’t really know what I would do if I didn’t work there.” See if these suggestions may help you and remember pause when you get agitated and take some deep breathes.